Trials and Tribulations

"One in, One Out"

• It looks like Titanics first round draft pick Adam "Pac-Man" Jones is free and clear of his alleged problem with the law. Witnesses have indicated he did nothing wrong (except perhaps for the company he was keeping) and his court appearance has been dismissed. Meanwhile, Ravens LB Terrell Suggs has his trial for aggravated assault scheduled to begin on Monday.

"More on Onterrio's Gee Whizzinator"

• As we noted yesterday Vikings RB Onterrio Smith was found in possession of a device used to get around drug testing. As we also told you, the device is known as "The Orginal Whizzinator". Well, more details have started to leak (sorry) out about this device. It apparently is shaped like a...ahhhh. Well sort of like a..... Actually it's like a male...well you get the point(sorry). It comes (sorry) with dried urine inside (for the actual test we assume). It is also allegedly available in 9 different skin tones. It's hard (sorry) to imagine the lengths (sorry) that some will go to in order to get around the rules. Whatever excuse Onterrio eventually produces, it seems pretty limp (sorry) to us.